Phyllis Diller's short course in comparative religion

 I've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui, and Deepak Chopra, but I find straight gin works best.

On Gin

This limerick’s for purging my sin,

Ousting lust and desire from within,

Which leaves oodles of space

For agape and grace,

Plus humility, virtue, and gin.

-- Robin Kay Willoughby